Mommy, How Could You!

My mom cheated.
Now Christmas is ruined,
Her lover fleeted.
To hide what they were doing.

I was almost asleep on Christmas Eve
When I heard a giggle, I jumped out of bed
I heard a really loud sneeze
Followed by a "Ow, I hit my head."

I then heard a "I'm sorry hun, my beard is soft and bushy."
My mom answered " Oh shut up you old mad, you're going to wake up Johnny."
Who was this old old man that my mother referred to
Surely it wasn't my dad, he was only 52.

I was about to put on my slippers when I remembered I had on footies.
So I raced out of bed to see who this stranger could be.
I creeped down the hall, one creek at a time.
Trying not to be heard, like a secret agent investigating a crime.

"Did you hear that" the mystery man said.
"Here what dear? Johnnys all put to bed."
" Are you sure because I hear little steps."
"I'm positive, now calm down and relax."

And then there was silence once more in the living room.
I took a deep breath and let out a silent "phew."

I got to the end of the hallway and looked around the corner
No one was in sight, Ugh! Err!

Just as I was about to head back to bed, I heard the old man say
"The visit was nice but I gotta be heading back to my slay,"

"Slay?" I said. Almost too loud.
No humans here drive slays around.
Only Santa, Santa? Santa! Santa is here!
He's the old man with the nice bushy beard.

I was so excited that I rand down the hall
I was so excited I tripped, and made a great fall.

As I got myself together, I looked up and paused
My mother was kissing old Santa Claus.
I can't wait to tell my dad.
He's goina' be so mad!

Mommy ruined Christmas for the whole world.
She let Santa take her as Daddy's girl.
Mommy ruined Christmas for the whole family.
But most of all mommy ruined Christmas for me.

Presents, food, stockings, don't matter.
I don't even wana' eat the cake batter!

Santa is on his own naughty list now!
No more gifts will be given out!
And its all because
Mommy was kissing Santa Claus.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!! :)